I am all registered for Bike MS 2018 in Oregon. It sounds daunting, being so far away. As I type this, it's cold, dark, and rainy outside. And I'm fighting a cold. I think back to last year, all the sweat, the long, lonely training rides, and the smoke from forest fires that clouded our views and fought with our lungs. I think of how my mind and energy is constantly bombarded with so many people in need. Children are at risk of being shot in schools left and right. Homelessness engulfs the most fragile at epidemic rates. Health care is feeling more and more like a privilege. Our very environment is constantly under criticism (winter is coming). I wonder about Bike MS. What will this year entail? Bike MS is never easy, but it is always rewarding, and always important. I think of how my body is at it peak right now. I am healthier than I've ever been, and more physically capable than I'll ever be. Is riding enough? It's something, I feel compelled to do something. How much will I be able to raise? My donors have been SO amazing over the years. I feel so indebted to them. What can I do for them (you?) this year? There is a lot to think about, and the time will come before I know it. 

I am already older than most people who develop disease. I am several years older than my mom when she was diagnosed. It seems like a lifetime ago. What does it feel like to her? When my mom was the age I am now, she was barely able to work, but she kept trying, she tried and tried. Do I have it in me to try as hard for her as she did for the world?