Occasionally I don’t ride my bike in to work. Sometimes I ride the bus. The bus I ride services a long stretch of hardened Seattle, including many stops for shelters, pawn shops, the needle exchange, the free clinic, Department of Health and Human Services, and more. Usually as many people have to stand as get to sit, all hours of the day. And given by the number of services along my route, It’s safe to say many people on my route are not having a good day. It seems most people aren’t having a good day in general, but I think the case is especially so on the bus.
Decreases in empathy, compassion, and respect in our country are a talking point of most everyone I talk to over age 35. I see data supporting these assumptions in positive psychology research, generational studies, studies looking the sociology of social media, texting behaviors, palliative and eldercare, and the like. As I rode the bus, I considered how the bus appears to be a sanctuary for these values. Everyone unanimously gives up seating for elders, the disabled and mothers. Even the loudest of mouths sensor their words when a young child is nearby. When someone misbehaves, the bus riders around them try to soften the situation. People crowd and cut and rush when trying to enter the bus, but once they are on, doors are held open, and accommodations are made. I wonder, what is it about the bus that makes this captive audience of stressed out, rushed, and generally grumpy people treat each other with kindness? How can we extend the way we treat each other on the bus to other situations? Don’t get me wrong, I see plenty of people on the bus deliberately elbow others, pick fights, eat cartons of smelly onions, urinate, or take up extra seats with luggage while 30 others have to stand, but they are easily the minority.
Today on my ride in, the bus suddenly stopped at a jerk at an intersection. I couldn’t see what happened, but presumably a pedestrian jumped out against the light or something like that. The bus stopped so hard and fast that the wheels squelched and people fell out of their seats. Pretty much everyone seated toppled out (over half the seats on my bus face the sides of the bus, so there is nothing to stop someone from falling forward except another person). People in the isles toppled on top of each other. I was one of the lucky few who happened to be standing behind a pole. My arms happened to be looped around the pole so when the bus stopped, I merely spun around, but didn’t fall. Several grasped on to me, however, instinctively grabbing whatever was around them that was upright. In the aftermath, several people groaned and hollered “OUCH!” which caused a chorus of, “Are you ok?” comments. The people around me apologized for grabbing onto me. There is a taboo against touching strangers, but I responded that I was glad to be a grabbing post since my positons was one of the few stable ones on the bus.